I Flew Across the World to Join a Startup and Was Rejected. Here's What I Learnt: 🛫🌎 ❌

Are you living in a Museum of Failure or a Gallery of Trying?

From Melbourne to Italy to London, here’s how I got to where I am today.

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Step 1: Find my best answer and start the process📍🇦🇺

In August of 2023, I stumbled upon an essay by Jack Rode “How to land a job in a startup”. I was about to graduate with no job lined up and no internships under my belt, just a year’s worth of partying at the best school in the world (Go Gators). I actually had no idea what I was going to do. Knowing nothing except that I had this international itch that needed scratching, I decided to follow Jack’s methodology and find my “best answer” to decide what I’d do after university.

Here’s what I came up with;

1. Wanted to be in a tech startup

2. Wanted to be in London

3. Wanted to be in Sales and Partnerships

4. Wanted to be in a company that values individual development and has great company culture

5. Wanted to believe in the product

So I literally searched up “Top 100 tech startups in London” and went down the list. I found Yonder and almost immediately fell in love with their product but more importantly, their company culture. From their CEO’s Medium Articles to their marketing director’s Linkedin bio “Mostly just annoying big banks” I loved everything that they stood for and the way they conducted business.

So I reached out to their team on LinkedIn. My social anxiety was apparent, I didn't want to shut doors by coming across desperate or weird, I combated these thoughts by saying ‘you’re not weird, you’re just hungry’. Reflecting on how many people I reached out to, I don’t think it was enough.

Lo and behold no one replied.

I had a mutual connection with the CEO of Yonder and understood the value of a warm introduction. I reached out to them to see if they could make an introduction, unfortunately for me they had committed the “cardinal sin on LinkedIn” (their words not mine) and accepted an invitation from someone they don’t know.

Knowing I was studying in Italy, I had to book a plane ticket anyways, I decided to book a one way, to metaphorically cut ties with home and fuel this fire in my belly. Galvanised by this idea of burning bridges through a one way ticket, I had no place to stay, no visa and no promise of a job, I was going ‘all in’ on a bet on myself.

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Step 2: Figure out the logistics📍🇮🇹

Due to the historical and political ties between the UK and Australia, I knew I was fortunate enough to stay in the UK for up to 180 days (6 months) without a visa. This gave me 6 months to get an offer to which then I’d move over to a Youth Mobility Visa. I shortened this deadline as to not burn a hole in my pocket but also to emphasise I didn't have to do this; it was a choice. A choice to ‘give it a go’. Failure meant I could spend the rest of my days not wondering ‘what if?’. Success meant I was capitalising on my youth, which didn’t rely on the outcome. Just by trying I was succeeding.¹

I gave myself 3 months to find something that ticked off all 5 of my requirements, it had to be all 5. I was being picky, it’s what I was going to spend my time and energy on, of course I’m going to be picky. It’s amazing how many people aren’t picky with their profession. Something you literally spend most of your day doing. Break down your day by the hour. 8 hours sleep² leaves you will 16 left. Work a 9-5 job? There’s another 8 hours gone, 8 left. An hour to get ready and get to work, another hour to get home and decompress, 6 left. By the time you’ve worked out and done your life admin, you’ve got about 4 hours left and me personally I’m way too tired to do anything productive with that. So fuck yes I am going to be picky.³

So I figured out the legalities of entering the country, now I had to figure out where I could stay. Short term, cousin’s couch (max 2 weeks) but knowing it’ll take longer than that to get into Yonder I had to find a longer term option. Being broke didn’t help my case. The growing trend of people working whilst traveling the world fascinated me. World Packers is a platform that connects travellers with hosts worldwide for work exchange and volunteer opportunities, I decided to volunteer in a hostel in Oxford in return for free accommodation. Had my interview, got accepted and I was rearing to go.

I was ‘capitalising on my youth’ where failure looked like me volunteering in a hostel (something I hadn't done yet but knew I’d rather do at 22 than 40), travel the world and visit all my friends studying abroad (Sweden, Barcelona, Edinburgh, Madrid, Berlin, Copenhagen). This was perfect, even if I didn’t get the job I was immersing myself in Oxford, a place I’d never visit if not for this reason.

In the back of my head I knew that volunteering in return for accommodation wouldn’t be easy, living in a hostel, would be hard. What I'd realised is the value comes from the hard. As mentioned in prior writings, living in Australia was becoming too familiar, too easy. This change of scenery, going from living with my parents to sharing a room with 8 strangers, cleaning and running the place was going to be a task. In reality, I was scrubbing semen, throwing away bloody tampons, plunging toilets and mopping floors all day everyday which believe me, isn’t what I want to do for the rest of my life. The experience did exactly what I wanted it to, it galvanised me to push myself to get to where I wanted to go.

Step 3: Action out the plan 📍🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿

I arrived in London on the 14th of December. Crashing on my cousin’s couch I was a nervous wreck as it was game time. The next day, CV in hand with no sim in my phone, I screenshotted the map directions to get to the Yonder office and on the bus I went.

I got to the front door to find it locked, I had to camp outside until someone left. Once they did, I walked in with a purpose, chin held high, shoulders back, I was a man on a mission. I got to reception, with no appointment booked, I asked to meet with any of the people I’d determined most relevant to the position I want to go into.

Given it was mid December it was not surprising most of team was off on Christmas holidays, there’s a level of irony that the founders (who are Australian) had flown back to Australia when I’d flown from Australia to introduce myself.

Another manager from a different section came down to speak with me. I hadn’t planned for this but I considered it a win as with such a small team they’d bound to talk amongst each other. To be honest, I was rattled. A nervous wreck and in disbelief I had gone from sitting on my mate’s couch in Anglesea to Yonder’s office, I fumbled. I came off needy, desperate and inexperienced. I need to work on high pressure situations. I was commended on my effort and told my CV would be given to the People Ops manager when she’s back from leave. I’ll never know what the manager at Yonder was thinking, but I know what I was, I was disappointed in myself.

I usually walk away from meaningful conversations with this feeling so familiar I can taste it. It’s a feeling that makes me believe I can run through walls. That feeling was missing when I’d left the Yonder office. I wrote in my diary on the bus home, “feels like I’ve shot my shot and missed” and after another couple more lines of feeling sorry for myself, I ended the journal entry with “what are you gonna do? roll over and die? Shooter’s shoot.”

I had to reload, embodying Kobe’s mamba mentality I went back to the drawing board endeavouring to get my own rebound and put up another shot as quickly as possible.

It was a couple days of running, reading and writing until my next breakthrough. Yonder had just released their first ever retail partnership with Batch LDN. This was my final day in London before I had to head to Oxford and I was eager to give it another go. Rather than knock on Yonder’s door again and hope by chance I’d be met with a different person I decided to knock on Batch’s door, talk shop and learn what I can about how and why they decided to partner with Yonder. Then I’d head to Yonder with a different perspective and hopefully blow their socks off with my persistence and lateral thinking.

I never made it to the Yonder office.

The founders of Batch enjoyed my ‘curiosity and hustle’ so much that they introduced me directly to the person I’d wished to speak to at Yonder.

They encouraged me rather than blindly walk into the Yonder office again, book a coffee after the Christmas break. They went a step further and challenged me to take on a project to show my skills rather than just talk about them. I walked out of their store on cloud 9. “Life changing conversations” is what I wrote in my journal next door. Remember that ecstatic feeling I yearn for after conversations? It was back baby.

After the Christmas break I’d set up a coffee with the person I’d flown across the world to see. I was overwhelmed with nerves and excitement (it’s amazing how much those two correlate). The coffee catch up confirmed everything I’d previously thought about the company. Her enthusiasm about work but more importantly life was complimented by her drive and ambition. Our catch up only made me want to work for her more.

Luck is when preparation meets opportunity. I am a firm believer in making your own luck. I think there’s a direct correlation between how hard you work and how lucky you get.

Fortunately for me, I understand the distinction between the things that are in my control and the things that aren’t. Unfortunately for me, there’s always going to be things that are out of my control. An open entry level sales/partnerships position at Yonder was one of them. At least for another year I was told there wasn't going to be anything open, and I didn't have a year to wait around just to apply.

What was open, was a Membership Support Associate position and I was encouraged to apply for that. It was here I made my first mistake.

Now they’re two schools of thought with what I could’ve done and I’m not entirely sure which yields better results. The first, is ‘anything and everything’. Be willing to do anything and everything for what you want. This concept appealed to me as I’m a sucker for an ‘unconventional story.’ The idea of the grind, starting from the bottom and through sheer grit and determination working my way up inspired me. I told them (and in my own head firmly believed) I was willing to do the CEO’s laundry, get everyone in the office coffee daily, anything and everything just to prove myself how dedicated I am to this journey.

The second is a much bolder/ confident theory that I’m learning from the win without pitching wherein which you position yourself as the expert and disqualify anyone who doesn't see your value. Hard task to juggle when you’re desperate (which I was). Truth is, I don’t think this framework would have worked as I’d put all my eggs in one basket which was both a strength and a weakness.

Anyways, I strayed from my ‘best answer’ of being in Sales and Partnerships and endeavoured down the interview process for this membership support role. I defended this decision through my anything and everything belief, this belief that I just needed to get my foot in the door, slug it out and then I’d get to where I want. I kept telling myself, I’ve done customer success before which I was decent enough and enjoyed it decently enough to warrant this change in pace. To be honest I was just happy I’d gotten an interview.

There were 4 interviews stages (for an associate level role?! God I love how much these guys do their due diligence!). Each was as nerve-wracking as the last. For reasons I’m yet to identify, I don’t interview well (don’t do well in high pressure situations, gotta work on this weakness Jav). To offset this I have to be different. I tend to lean on my strengths to offset my weaknesses (sometimes a little too much).

Remember that challenge my friends at Batch had set me? Knowing the value in going above and beyond and setting yourself apart from the pack I ventured to take up their challenge. So I created this video.

God this video brings a smile to my face. In hindsight, you can tell my bias towards growth and partnerships, not once did I mention membership support 🤦🏾. I still love it and wouldn’t change a thing.

Somehow I made it through all four rounds of interviews. I have never heard, seen nor been through an interview process as thorough, enjoyable and diligent as Yonder’s. Each interview was with someone different. Because of amount of interviews, an applicant could vet the company just as much as the company vets the applicant. After each interview they promised a 24 hour turnaround with a decision (crazy how much relief this gives an applicant). They stated the salary range on the job description and gave ample resources to prepare.

When they announced their decision to not hire me, I can’t lie. I was bitter. I felt unworthy and that sat uneasy with me.

Call it grit, stubbornness or plain stupidity but for some reason I didn’t believe that my story had ended.

I’ve always wanted to do something as outrageous and outlandish as this^. I emailed them and said “I’ll work for you for free for a month, if at the end of the month you’d rather pay me then lose me let’s work something out, if not we’ll shake hands and go on our separate ways.”

Whilst I waited for a response I took to the streets. Interviewing strangers on their experience in the credit card industry in a bid to express how earnest I was and that they were wrong saying no.

Inspired by a scene in Rose Island, I was willing to camp outside their office until they offered me a role or had to get the police to escort me out. Luckily it never came to that.

I was referred back to the fact even an internship opportunity couldn’t be promised until a year later. It was a harsh reality but a reality nonetheless.

I was comforted by the fact that during the interview process they had gotten to know me better than I knew myself. They knew membership support wasn't where I wanted to be, even if I thought it was. Their reasoning for saying no was valid.

“You're incredibly passionate about Yonder, Jav, and your go-getter attitude is truly undeniable. Your extensive research on Yonder and genuine eagerness to be here was impressive. However, what we felt was missing for us was the motivation behind your desire to work within Member Support. It's clear that Yonder is where you want to be, but we couldn't extract answers that conveyed a strong drive for customer obsession or support-related insights during the interview.” 

This insightful and touching feedback coupled with their People and Ops manager spending an hour with me over the phone (a denied applicant) providing advice and counsel made it bittersweet to close that chapter in my life and move on. I endeavoured to have the same level of poise and professionalism as they did, moving on with my head held high knowing I’d exhausted all avenues in a respectful, honourable manner.

I had achieved my goal. I could now spend the rest of my days not wondering ‘what if?’. I was capitalising on my youth, which didn’t rely on the outcome. Just by trying I was succeeding.

Onto the next.

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It’s crazy how what goes around comes around. In the article that inspired this entire expedition Jack says;

The most important thing to keep in mind here is: you are not asking for a job, yet.“Ask for a job, get advice. Ask for advice, get a job.”

Little did I know that a cold message in 2022 would change my life. Being sincere will open more doors than being smart ever will. Everyone's smart, distinguish yourself by being kind.⁴

Remember when I said luck is when preparation meets opportunity?

“Your Yonder video got sent to me from our Head of RevOps and they asked if you were still looking for work!”

Life has a funny way of working out. When a Sales and Partnership role was offered to me at me&u (formerly Mr Yum) I had to go back to my North Star, my 5 guiding principles articulated as my ‘best answer’.

1. To be in a tech startup ✅

2. To be in London✅

3. To be in Sales and Partnerships✅

4. To be in a company that values individual development and has great company culture✅ ⁵

5. To believe in the product ✅

I’m now 3 months into working at me&u as their sales and partnerships associate and am loving it. Yonder was right, I did need some more support/structure than I thought to develop and grow. Being part of a team of 20 trying to do something new in a completely different culture is difficult. But it helps when you have the knowledge that has been tried and tested many a time by your colleagues across the globe. The beauty in a scale up is the balance between support and independence. I’m supported by 200 people way smarter than me but I’m trusted and have the autonomy to make decisions by myself.

In a recent 1 on 1 with the MD of the business, he told me I’m in a unique position wherein which I get to be inquisitive and solve any of the businesses’ problems that interest me. I fucking love that. I’m getting to break down sales, identify the aspects I don’t enjoy and lean into the aspects I do enjoy. I’m learning all about partnerships; the different types and what makes one great. I’m learning so much and I’m leaning into it. It’s all very new to me but I’m finding quite a lot of interest in Growth Operations.

It’s been a long journey, but I’m only just getting started. I know I’ve yapped a lot but here’s what I learnt along the way:

1. Find Success in the Attempt, Not the Outcome.

By switching my success metrics to ‘capitalising on my youth’ instead of getting a job at Yonder I found a lot of relief in the process. The pressure that I had placed on myself was alleviated just by getting out of bed and giving it a go. I find this idea of capitalising on one’s youth to be quite relatable given the fact; today is the youngest we’re all ever going to be. There’s beauty in that and I’ve always taken it for granted.

What this journey has also reaffirmed in me is; nothing changes if nothing changes. Whilst I made this big gigantic leap, it doesn’t have to be such a drastic change. The answer isn’t in moving countries, it’s about recognising what needs to change in your life and putting the steps in place to change them. By placing the success of this change, in the attempt of the change, I got rid of all the pressure and stress of attaining the outcome I wanted. Just by trying I was succeeding. Falling in love with the process is always the goal as the man who loves walking will walk further than the man who loves the destination.

I only realised this lesson after everything was said and done. Along the way I forgot capitalising on my youth was the goal and put all my eggs in one basket, that basket being Yonder. Remember when I said I’d strayed from my best answer and applied for a Membership Support Role? I had originally thought “how bad do you want to succeed?”, if you want it bad enough you’ll make Yonder happen. I soon realised this was a fallacy. When the 100m sprinters line up to race in the Olympics, they all want to win just as badly as the next runner. It isn’t about how badly they’re willing to win in that moment. It’s about the systems they’ve had in placed and the work they put in, 6 months ago, 1 year ago, 10 years ago or even a lifetime ago to get them to where they are on race day, the start line. Whilst longevity isn’t only based on loving what you do, it certainly fucking helps, after all who wants to be successful and unhappy?

No one can compete with you, on being you⁶. You know what you like and what you don’t like, what you’re good at and what you’re not good at. You’re your own expert. Know yourself and back yourself but take the pressure away of making it all work out by falling in love with the process.

’The Walk’ by Jack Kays is such a phenomenal song that encapsulates the necessity in stopping to smell the roses along this walk of life.

2. Recognising Privilege.

I’d always known I lived a pretty privileged life; not wondering where my next meal was going to come from, private school, two loving parents. It’s something I try not to take for granted but what this journey has emphasised to me is the absolute privilege of having a fall back option. How lucky am I that if it all turned to shit, I didn’t get a job, or I got a job and hated it, I could just pack up my things and go back to living with my parents. I’m so grateful that my parents worked so hard, forwent many things just to give my brother and I the world. Did you know my mum was in the national women’s netball team for Sri Lanka when her mum (my grandmother, rest in peace the GOAT) told her there’s no money in it and ‘forced’ her to go be a doctor (I mean name a netballer, let alone a Sri Lankan one). And my mum did. My father could’ve “lived like a king” off the tea plantations he’d inherit but he yearned for the West, particularly Australia and sold it all to up and move. I am my father’s son.

While I’d love to retire them so they can go travel the world (@ me&u pay me more so I can retire my parents x) the next best thing is living a life they never could and sharing it all with them. God my mum loves a photo dump in the family WhatsApp. I need to call them more. Call your parents if you’re lucky enough to still have them, let them know you love them and that I said hi!

I have seen places my parents have never seen, done things they’ll never do but they’ve sacrificed things that I’ll never have to sacrifice. For that I am lucky.

You’ll often hear the lack of a fall back option being the foundation of one’s success.
Alexander the Great burned his boats upon arrival on the shores of Persia. By burning his boats, Alexander committed his men to victory over the Persians who greatly outnumbered the Macedonians. In 1519, Spanish Captain, Hernán Cortés landed on the shores of the new world, Mexico, and also gave the order to “burn the boats”. While this ideology saw them victories that would echo throughout history, my story involved recognising the privileged position I was in, recognising I didn't have to be where I was, it was a conscious choice. I owed it if not to myself but to those who forwent before me to at least try. My parents worked hard to build this boat for me to go out and explore the world, if I didn’t like what I found, I could always sail home.

3. Being Ambitious vs Being Content

For the past 9 months and for the rest of my life I fear I’ve been waging a war inside my own head. This masculine urge to be the greatest ever, achieve and conquer all is in direct opposition to this idea that my life, all life, is ephemeral (of no lasting significance).

I have always identified with being ambitious. I wore the adjective as a badge of honour, glowing proudly when affiliated with my name. I owe quite a lot to my ambition. It gets me out of bed every morning, has taken me across the world and is the reason I love trying new things. I attribute my ambition to be foundational in this idea I subscribe to of ‘being better than I was yesterday’. What I’ve failed to realise is how my ambition has been robbing me of enjoying the simplicities in life.

I’ve struggled to acknowledge how much I’ve struggled this past couple of months. I’ve never felt more anxious, stressed and detached. I’ve left home with ambitions of “making something of myself.” This generic phrasing has left me lonely and lost, something I have struggled for so long to accept. Why wasn’t I content with the way things were? There was a point I hated my ambition, which was really foreign to me. After speaking with a couple of other ambitious individuals I found peace in patience.

Being patient, is something I’d never describe myself as. I’ve never worked on it. I never realised but I’ve been actively working against it ever since I got an iPhone. When was iPhone was invented boredom became dead.

Today I’m actively working on being patient. If I’m overthinking I write, if I’m under-thinking I read and in attempt to calm the noises in my head, I sit with just my thoughts and meditate for 10 minutes. I do these 3 things daily (or try to at least). Patience allows me the ability to be both ambitious and content at the same time. It allows me to fail knowing I don’t have to get it right every time. This gives me the confidence to try more which in turn means I’m more likely to kick a goal if I’m taking more shots. By having the courage to do, I’m having the courage to fail. Patience is the engine behind that machine.

4. The Opportunity Cost of Life.

I’d be lying if I said this journey and London has been all glitz and glamour. Don’t get me wrong, the city is amazing, my job is great, the people I work with are greater but at the end of the day there’s an opportunity cost to it all.

If I’m honest, I do miss home. My grandmother just passed away and it’s hard not being there to give mum a hug and to tell her I love her. I miss not being able to go to dinner with my friends, I miss the weather, my parents cooking, my old boxing gym.

It sounds hypocritical but I miss the sense of familiarity my old routine gave me. The same routine and familiarity that drove me across the world in search of something different.

I sit here, having achieved everything I set out to do and yet all of life’s problems aren’t magically solved. I wasn’t categorically happier having accomplished what I wanted and I was so confused why.

The truth is I still get lonely, hungry and tired. We all do. It doesn't matter what country you’re in or how much money is in your bank account. What I realised sitting alone in my kitchen on a rainy summer’s day (more common than you think in London), is; “this is enough, I have enough”. Roof over my head, food in my belly and good conversations is more than enough for me. If I’m honest, I forget that far too often.

My motivation for this expedition was so at the end of my life I wasn’t wondering ‘What if” but I think the reality is that will always be the question. “What if I stayed in Australia?” “What if I left to a different city?”. I don’t get to hug my parents but at the same time I do get to experience central London living at 22 years old. If I had to give my younger self some advice it’d be; you can have it all, just not at the same time, appreciate what you have while you have it and you’ll be the richest man alive.

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If you’ve made it this far I appreciate you for reading. I’d love to hear your thoughts, positive or negative. It’s taken 4 months to write this essay and I can’t believe I’ve written 5000+ words on my own accord, my high school English teachers would be quaking!

In my notes app, this essay was titled “How I got into Yonder”, as you can see, I’ve had to make some adjustments so I guess that’s the final lesson, life doesn’t always go as you plan- and that’s okay, you’ve just got to rest, reload and go again, that’s all you can do.

Festina Lente,

Jav

1. I wonder what other areas of life one could apply the concept ‘trying is succeeding’.

Tossing the outcome aside does away with the pressure of succeeding, which inspires me to try new and more things. Something for me, and you to think about.

2. Anyone who says you don’t need that much doesn’t prioritise their health.

3. Being picky is a privilege which I’ll touch on later in the essay. Point is I know way too many privileged private school kids who are picky with what type of carbs they eat but what they do with their time and who they surround themselves with.

4. The secret in cold messaging is genuinity. I wasn’t being insincere or insidious. I had no ulterior motivation other than telling the guy I liked what he wrote!

5. I knew Mr Yum (pre merger company with me&u) had a great culture because of my conversations with Jack and Stefan. Culture always takes a hit during and post merger as you’re essentially mashing up two competitors to make a ‘better’ one- with a load of redundancies. I saw this as an opportunity rather than a setback, I knew nothing of exYum or ex me&u. I was to be an amalgamation of both, the epitome of ‘better together’ (company slogan)

6. Once again, shoutout Jack Rode